"Food foam contains no nutrition, after two days your body will start digesting itself"

These days are pretty awful. It’s not an all the time thing. Although I always have a low grade hurt going on. However, sometimes the hurt swells into a powerful pain that I feel all over. I’ve learned that talking to people in the house will do nothing to alleviate the pain, it usually just turns into anger and ultimately that causes more pain for me.

However, I have learned how to use the pain. At this stage the aches and the racing thoughts overcome my need to eat. Since this pain is going to be around no matter what it works great at distracting me from the need to eat. I can go at least a day with nothing but water before the hunger pangs overtake the existential/broken relationship pain.

The long and short of this is that I only need to eat once a day. Then when I eat it doesn’t even need to be big. In fact, I’ve noticed that the more regular this becomes the smaller the portions I need to eat to feel full. Also, it probably sounds silly but I actually feel thinner when I’m hungry. This “diet” has actually translated into real weight loss I’m under 200 for the first time since I went over 200. At 6'3" I still have plenty to lose before it would be a problem.