It's time for the real

It’s time for the real story about the DFWblog happy hour. I’ve been reading all these gushy entries about how everyone enjoyed it. Survived it is more like it. I was there and I must recant even my own previous entry about said event.

19:00 I arrived at the New Amsterdam with Andy, Dave, Erica, and Mark. As the saying goes “Confidence is high.” We were all looking forward to seeing members of our dfwblog tribe.

19:17 Leia arrived with her promised name tags, and here is where the terror began. Leia and her posse of gun-toting bloggers had us on our knees. Those name tags were to tape our mouths shut…and oh that dog…her dog Gracie was with her and I…sniff sob let me compose myself the memories are still so fresh…Gracie flew through the air tackling me as I tried to escape. As I lay pinned underneath her I could see from her eyes that she was feasting on the terror in mine.

Unknown We were gathered up like meat and taken to an undisclosed location. I was hit over the head and blacked out so I had no idea where we were or how long I had been there. Then the Richard Marx started playing over the loudspeakers. It was so loud I thought my ears would bleed. I thought all the jokes about Richard Marx from Leia had been funny and cute, little did I know she had secret plans for his music.

3 hours later My clan, my tribe, my fellow dfwbloggers had all succumbed to the brainwashing. I dug my way out of the basement with a spoon I keep in my blue bag for just such an emergency. I had always hoped I wouldn’t have to use it. I’m afraid of what’s next. The Large Head Empire is building and now she has the beginnings of an elite cadre of designers, writers and developers at her disposal. I thought I could play along but I had to let this out. God help me.

14:24 next day Josh, Jeremy, Cheri, Jessica, Jason, Tamara, and many others have all related their brainwashed version of events. As of right now a certain large head has been conspicuously silent on the events of 9/26.